माँ

याद है आज भी वो बचपन प्यारा
वो डगमगाते कदमो को तेरी ऊँगली का सहारा
हर मुश्किल के सागर में तेरी ममता का किनारा,
चाहे पापा की डांट हो या सोलह का पहाडा.

वो खेल कूद के थक के घर आना
'मम्मी भूख लगी' जोर से चिलाना
वो लस्सी, वो मठरी और आम का आचार,
तेरे हाथो का जादू, उसपर तेरी ममता और प्यार,

जब दोस्तों से लड़ के मैं कमरे में रोती
तुम बिना कुछ पूछे मेरे पास बैठी होती,
जब कभी हार के मैं घर वापस आती,
तुम मेरे लिए सबसे अच्छा खाना बनाती.

मेरी हर जीत में, मेरी हर हार में,
मेरे हर छोटे बड़े राज में,
कभी कुछ कहके कभी कहे बिना,
तुम मेरे साथ थी हर हाल में.

मेरी सहेली, मेरी गुरु, मेरी शान हो तुम,
मेरी राह मेरी दिशा मेरी आधार हो तुम,
ममता का सागर आपार हो तुम,
मेर जीवन का सार हो तुम.

With arms wide open

.

With arms wide open I'm waiting for you.
I've made your bed with dreams which i wish comes true.

You've given my life a whole new meaning.
How my life will be with you, is all I'm dreaming.

I will tell you stories and will sing for you the most beautiful songs
Will show you the world, all rights and all wrongs.

I will teach you not to win but never to give up in life.

The joy of earning a thing and the worthlessness of getting it in rife.

I will hide you in my arms, whenever you get scared
and strengthen you to face the challenge again.

I will guide you in every step of your life till god has given me time.
I wish you a beautiful life and like the stars may you shine.

One early morning feeling

A strange feeling of nothingness,
neither good nor bad,
a stillness, continuous numbness,
neither happy nor sad.

Sitting in my balcony, staring at the horizon,
n0thing to do, nowhere go,
I dont want anyone to break this trance
i need no company for sometime more.

Is it satisfaction or is it emptiness?
or both blend into one?
it doesn't really matter today
as i care to understand none

In few hours life will start its usual course,
and i will be lost in the day,
I will not bother to think about myself
in so much of detail.

Loneliness

How do you define loneliness ?? when you are alone and there is no one around you ? when you are left out of the crowd ? when you have no one to talk to ...
i think loneliness is much worse than this.... its when you have people around you ... when you are amongst a crowd and worse, with people who call themselves close to you and you still don't feel comfortable...
its the feeling when your heart is bubbling with emotions but you cant talk because you are scared that you'll not be understood ...
its the feeling when you desperately need a hug but you don't move your arms forward...
its the feeling when you loose and there is no one to cry with ..
its the feeling when your best friend is with you but cant see through you..
its the feeling which cut you like knife and you feel hurt but cant really call for help... because you cant put it in words .. and even if you do you know there is no one to listen to your call...
its the feeling when you don't wanna make any more friends and
when in the middle of the day you just wanna hide yourself under your bed wrap your arms around yourself and cry hard ... and get out of the room as if all is fine...
that's how loneliness gets on to you ... when you know there is no one to look up to or look back to ... and you see no end to it ... and think that you will get use to it ... but initially every day it get worse... then you stop shedding tears but it keeps hurting.. and then over a period of time you get submerged in the whole feeling... its like the drugs which does pain a little in the start and you know its not good for you .. but you don't wanna give it up .... because you know there is no one waiting for you outside and so you create a world of your own ...
so you start enjoying it...

Tired

With a weak body and an injured heart,
I could just keep myself from falling apart.

Slowly moving - one step at a time,
Amongst a crowd but none who is mine.

I'm moving on but know not where to go,
I cant see anything, just the vast sky and the sea shore.

I wish i could blend with the sky or dissolve in sea,
or in the dark night which lay ahead of me.

Such a beautiful night, i want to fold and sleep,
I wish this night never ends, there is nothing more i wish to see.

Some Truths!

Some truths better left alone than trying to understand.

Some relationships left without being named.

Some feelings just to be felt once and never to be expected again.

Some bonds to be cherished forever and never get enough of.

Some people you feel blessed to have in life but still take them for granted.

Some moments you want to be what you are not.

Some people you cry for and never tell them what they mean to you.

Some things you crave for but you know you will never take them Even if they are available.

Some times you are madly in love with two people and justify any one.

Some times you want to punish yourself by living and not dying.

Some times you are not alone even though there is no one with you.

These so many 'Sometimes' makes your life worth every moment.

kambakht Ishq

I am the wife of my Hero. I used to be a thinker, a writer, a painter n lot more but now most importantly i am a part of him. And i am so submerged in it that it feels impossible to go back n find my old self. This blog is one of those attempts.
Not that being in love with him is not fulfilling. It is. With each passing day i go more deep and deep and deep. but loosing my own self is scary... Its like m going away from myself.
Everyday I'm more in love with him. I think of him when I'm travelling. I dream about dancing with him like when you first time fall in love. I wait for him like mad. I talk to him when he is not around. I wait for the night, to sleep in his arms and wish the morning should come a little late. I need him like a baby needs his mother..... arggghhh .. m i getting obsessed? I don't know. I don't even know whether its normal. but my friends don't behave like this. i mean we are already two years married but still my urge to get more of him never ceases.
I hope I'm not eating up on his space. And I'm scared of loosing my individuality and end up being his shadow.
But its so uncontrollable. I continue to let him take control of me and be mesmerise by him. kambakht Ishq !